Wednesday, April 25, 2012

FInal Details

T went with his sibilings and Mom today to plan all the service details for his Dad's funeral.  Service to be held on Saturday here in town and burial on Monday up north.  He has been by her side through most of this whole ordeal.  He was with her from the day Dad entered the hospital until Sunday night when he came home at 10 pm.  He was back up there for the final step 13 hours later. 

I met him at the church where they finalized all the service information.  I met him there to pick him so he could finally come home.  They invited me in to sit with them during this planning.  That was not my intentions.  I went just to pick him up and since Bean was with me she wanted to go in the building with him and Babcia (T's mom - polish word for Grandma).  I was going to sit in the waiting room incase Bean needed me.  I felt bad since none of the other spouses were present.  They planned the whole service with readings and music.  I was asked to read one of their choices.  I believe I will read from the book of Malachi.  I cannot remember for sure if that was the one I was assigned to, or which specific verses.  I hope I can do the read justice and not break down.

Once T go home he looked exhausted.  I think the moment in walked in the door he left all the strength outside that he had left.  He laid on the couch with his eyes closed most of the time. He went and laid in bed with Mads and Bean for a bit and then just laid there with the lights off.  I went and laid next to him.  Placed my head on his chest and wanted so badly to let the world melt away for awhile for him...  but kids do not allow that to happen.  It lasted for less than 5 minutes.  By the time I was done tending to them and got them settled in bed.. he was asleep, deep asleep.. snorning and all.  I am sure it was good to sleep in our bed and just be home.  The chaios and all.  I am sure all his emotions will come full circle at this point.  He has been so focused on his Mom and keeping her grounded that I don't this he has had a moment to process his own heart.

Tomorrow our oldest daughter will celebrate her 10th birthday.  I am so glad her Daddy will be here for that.  I took this week off of work and serving lunch at school so I am available if they need for funeral things... but tomorrow is all about Abs!!!  Just my baby!  T and I are going to decorate the house with balloons and streamers.  I am going hang the birthday banner up and cut out her name to hang it on the wall.  I have asked all her aunts, uncles, grandparents and a few good friends of ours to email me a message to put on those letters. She picked out what she wants T to make her for dinner and then the two of them are going to go see a performance of Wiz of Oz that her best friend is cast in.  The whole family was going to go, but I think the two of them really need time alone with all that has happened.  I am going to take her on Friday after school to get her nails done.  :)  So excited.  There was no way I was going to let this day pass without large celebrations!  It is bittersweet considering the events that will follow. :(

Makes me think even more how important it is to express your love for those that are important daily.  God blesses us with them, we shouldn't ever take them for granted.

With that... Lalu More,  D

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